Your Healing Is Not Performance Art
Hey love,
Let me tell you something straight from my heart: healing is not performance art.
Too many of us are out here trying to prove to folks—especially the ones who hurt us—that we’re “healed,” “better,” and “unbothered.” But that’s not healing, that’s theatre. And real healing? It’s messy, quiet, and humbling. It happens in the background, not on a stage.
Let me be clear: there is nothing wrong with sharing your growth. But there is everything wrong with seeking validation through it.
Healing is between you and God, not you and Instagram.
This newsletter is your permission slip to come down from the pedestal. You don’t have to convince anybody that you’re doing the work. You don’t have to post your therapist receipts or your “soft girl era” selfies to prove that you’ve arrived. Because the truth is—we never arrive. We evolve.
Let’s go deeper.
What does research say about healing, but not performing?
According to Dr. Kristin Neff, a leader in self-compassion research, people who practice self-kindness and mindful awareness of their emotional growth are more resilient—not because they prove their healing, but because they nurture it (Neff, 2003).
Self-compassion focuses on how you treat yourself, and indirectly shows others how to treat you. Practicing peace is an internal decision that starts with you. No one but you have the power to dictate the amount of true peace you experience in your life. The peace you feel is indicative of the evolution of your healing.
The same kindness and care you offer to others, you need to offer to yourself.
Enjoying what you’re reading? Check out this blog post next: How to Experience Peace
Biblical scripture that offers insight on your healing:
“Be still, and know that I am God.” – Psalm 46:10
Stillness is a form of trust. When you stop performing, you start listening. And that’s when real transformation begins. A lack of faith and trust in your healing process can stunt your growth. You begin to look to people outside of you to validate your healing rather than paying attention to how you’re handling situations better than you ever have.
Journal prompts moving your from performative healing to real transformation
- Where in my life have I been performing healing instead of practicing it?
- Why do I need others to see my healing?
- What does their validation do for me? Does it make me feel real, seen, and/or heard?
- How can I practice self-compassion every day?
If you’re new to my blog, you should know that I am an avid journaler and I will ALWAYS vouch for journaling being the greatest tool in healing. Answering these journal prompts allow you to be real with yourself without the looming judgement of others. With just your mind, your heart, your soul & spirit being displayed on a physical piece of paper, you can really find a great sense of clarity. You get to see what’s going on in your mind.
Call to Action:
Stay tuned for your next June newsletter on Tuesday, June 17th. If you haven’t subscribed to the weekly Inner Convo Evolved Newsletter already, type in your email below this post!
With peace, love & evolved inner convos,
Veronica
Founder, Inner Convo Evolved
Sources Cited:
Neff, K. D. (2003). The development and validation of a scale to measure self-compassion. Self and Identity, 2(3), 223–250. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298860309027
Veronica Speaks 
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